From My Heart

You may have noticed I haven’t posted in a while. I wasn’t sure if I should share this here, but decided I would. Last week I had a miscarriage. I’m not gonna lie it’s been really hard. The hardest thing I’ve ever had to deal with.

This whole thing has reminded me of the people in my life. When you loose something you realize what you have. It has made me so much more thankful for my husband who was by my side through all of this. And I’m thankful for my daughter, who doesn’t understand enough for it to really affect her, so she’s remained as cheerful as ever, which brings me sunshine. I’m also grateful to my mom who I was on the phone with several times throughout all of it, the midwife and midwife student who squeezed in an appointment with me when I started getting worried, my husband’s Aunt who watched Gracia for a few hours and the many, many people who have been praying for us.

During all of this a sermon I heard a few months ago kept coming to my mind. The speaker was a young man who had lost his dad to colon cancer and he himself ended up having to undergo major colon cancer surgery. His main verse was 2 Corinthians 1:3-4, “Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God. ” I had a good example of this last week. One of the people that has brought me some of the most comfort in this has been my mom, who herself had a miscarriage before any of us other kids were born. She let me know how she felt when she went through it and gave me some good advice. Maybe someday I can be an encouragement to someone else because of this. I know it has opened my eyes to how hard a loss can be and my heart aches for those that have had miscarriages, can’t get pregnant, have lost a loved one or have had any major trial (which includes pretty much everyone).

I knew miscarriages were common, even among healthy people, but never thought one would happen to me. It was a reminder that all I have, I could loose. The only promise I have of security is my security in Christ and I need to be thankful for what I have now. Sorry this has nothing to do with my blog. I just thought I’d share it before getting back to my regular posts.